When Your World Turns Upside Down

Written in 2012…

When your world turns upside down
And you don’t know what to do,
Try standing on your head, and
Watch the answers come to you!

A year ago, a lady came to see me about getting a headstone put up at the cemetery for our son James. More than two years had passed since his accident, and we still did not have a proper marker. When she came, I was optimistic, thinking we could have one up in time for what would have been his birthday in July. Little did I know that two weeks later everything would change…

It all started with a visit to the dentist with Nathaniel early in May. A simple tooth extraction led to a panoramic x-ray, diagnostic imaging, oral surgery, several weeks of medication, a complete change in diet, and now the need for braces. Dental insurance is not all it’s cracked up to be, and suddenly we need to come up with thousands of dollars we don’t have, in order to ensure future dental health for our youngest son. The money will come, but at the moment, it looks pretty bleak.

The blogging tribe I’d been with for a year and a half underwent major changes throughout the summer months. Our one remaining leader and a handful of faithful members had worked long and hard to find what would work for us, and the changes were made at the end of the summer.

The network marketing company I’m with made a sudden and totally unexpected move to merge with another, larger company. The change was a good one, and people were seeing quick results with some amazing new products, spiraling them into success beyond their wildest imaginings. But while it galvanized some into action, it took me by surprise and I did not have the means to take the necessary action. I felt as if I had been left behind, in an impressive cloud of dust. It takes a little money to come in at the optimal level, and it also takes a major shift in my own way of doing business.

Last, but not least, was the change that showed the most immediate promise. Nathaniel had graduated from Westlock Elementary in June, and asked to be homeschooled for Grade 7. His reasons were solid, and a reflection of my own concerns for his readiness for the much larger, faster paced junior/senior high school in town, where he would be faced with a whole new set of challenges and problems. He was not ready for that, academically, socially or emotionally. But this was no light decision for me. Keenly aware of all the reasons I sent him to school five years earlier, I seriously doubted that I could do an adequate job of educating him at home. But once the decision was made, all the doubts rolled away. Nathaniel loved learning at home, and I was happy with the way it was going.

Four major changes and a few minor ones, in such a short time, were a HUGE challenge for me. But these words of wisdom keep coming back to me…

Quitters never win, and Winners never quit!


Update: When the frost is gone from the ground, two headstones will be installed side by side… one for our son James, and one for our son-in-law Sean, who passed away in August 2013. I’ve given up network marketing for the time being, in favour of pursuing a writing career. Nathaniel is in his 3rd year of homeschooling, and we’re both enjoying it. All is progressing in the right direction!

© Willena Flewelling


  1. Hi Willena,

    Gosh, when it rains it pours! Sometimes everything just seems to go wrong all at one time. When this kind of thing happens to me, it always makes me wonder if I need to take a different direction or just roll with the punches.

    Sometimes it requires some solitude and re-adjusting to this kind of situation. But whatever happens, I never quit! As you did here, and now the outcome: Your son being home schooled is the best! Jame’s headstone is done. And you have given up network marketing, and followed your passion to write.


    Donna Merrill recently posted…Early Mover AdvantageMy Profile

    • Sometimes it take me ‘way too long to see that I need to change direction! I’ve been guilty of listening to others instead of my own heart. For many years I felt guilty for writing, because it took too much time. Now I know it’s not only necessary, but it is my calling. I get to enjoy what I love doing best! 😀
      Willena Flewelling recently posted…Just Havin’ FunMy Profile

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